Birdie (Poetry)

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  • #7266
    LeTiredOfYou4
    LeTiredOfYou4
    Participant

    Birdie, may I weave through the torrential rainstorms pouring within the dark depths encased in your mind?

    Like an orchestra, I can faintly register the jagged edges of symphonies whispering ever so lightly in unfurled spirals.

    Your heart heaves to the melodies of the cackling earthquakes cradled within the dimly lit quarters of your soul.

    Birdie, the desolate silence now echoes and rings loudly in the pale walls of your broken spirit. Your mind’s sheathed in locks of glistening chains, that trails you.

    Birdie, are you alright?

    >Would it be necessary to continue this, or should I just leave it? I’m awful at describing what my work means or what its supposed to be about. It would be great if anyone could just say what emotion(s) they felt while reading? Thank you!

     
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  • #7271
    katiejang
    katiejang
    Participant

    It sounds great! I think you can leave it where you ended it. If you’re wondering what this poems looks like and feels like from an outsider’s opinion, I’m happy to share! You created a vivid picture in my mind. Right away, I began to think in a dark, almost gothic sense. It definitely made me feel an empathetic loneliness, depressing in a beautiful and melancholic way. I think this is a beautiful poem and I love how vague you are.

    • #7272
      LeTiredOfYou4
      LeTiredOfYou4
      Participant

      Thank you! I read it over, and I agree with you. I think I’ll just leave it as it is.
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