i am [Poem]

Home Page Forums Critique Central i am [Poem]

  • Author
  • #7551

    Before any one asks, the ‘I’s are meant to be lower case.🐨

    <p style=”text-align: center;”>i am</p>

    i am the shadow

    i am the creature

    In the back of the room

    Feeding on


    And cynicism


    i am the backdrop

    i am the grey shade

    In the bright sunny sky

    That you don’t

    Really know at all

    Or want to ever


    i am the animal

    i am the duckling

    In the color of death

    Leaning on

    My own past failures

    And my toppled dreams


    i am nobody

    i am every one

    In the dead of the night

    With my fists

    Bleeding crimson

    On broken brick walls


    i am the smiler

    i am the actor

    In the height of my act

    Failing to

    Stop worrying

    And not give in to


    i am forgotten

    i am a dreamer

    The world will always say

    That they are

    Another gone

    Another no one

  • #7555

    Woah… That was honestly so powerful. The lead up to the last line was hugeee….I had no idea where it was heading! The only thing I don’t quite get is the second to last line “another gone.” I’m guessing it’s like saying they are also lost? Just wanted to verify!

    …seriously i love this!!!!! :)))

  • #7583

    That was deep and thought provoking and ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS!

    “And not give in to” what? I honestly like that it trails off like that, it makes you finish the thought with your own struggle.

    I just had an appointment with my orthodontist. I came away slightly sore and distinctly grumpy. This poem connected with me deeply and made me smile and cheer up a bit, in a rather morbid way. Thank you!

  • #7598

    Yeah, that’s what it meant-actually, since lost and gone are both one one syllable, I may just replace ‘gone’ to make the ending more clear. Thanks for the comment!

    And I’m glad you could connect with my depressing writing, pookajordan. Wait-no, that came out wrong. I’m glad this poem made you cheer up a little. 🐨

You must be logged in to reply to this topic.

Who’s Online?

No one is online right now

What is Critique Central?

Critique Central is a forum where you can submit a piece of your work to get advice on. Fill out the form to see what others think of your writing!

Yes No